= Emotions

I hope that compared to me, most of you are having a banner year.  I had high hopes for 2012, I really did.  And I would like to preface what comes next with the disclaimer that I am usually the optimist, the one that find humor in most things.  Yet…yet even I sometimes don’t understand why things happen, why a sequence of events that seems to be headed in a good direction takes that sudden turn for the worst.

A few examples of my year so far.

My company lost it’s contract which means our ‘family’, people who have worked together for a decade, and some even longer is being torn apart.  People are having to make decisions that they figure are best for their families and their careers. Deep down I know that the decisions are based on business not a personal level, but that does not lighten the heaviness in my heart.

As a result of this, my husband is going to be working in the Middle East, Kuwait for two years.  It’s an adjustment for me to suddenly be the one that takes care of everything in the house, that is responsible for all the decisions that affect my home.

A friend of mine came home and found her husband dead the other week.  They’d recently returned from a honeymoon, they’d saved up for the first year of their marriage. Heartbreak.

Another dear friend lost her son, the brave teenager lost his battle against cancer.  The dreaded disease that kills so many. Again, Heartbreak.

I could keep adding to the list, but it’s not necessary, you get the gist.  This morning I woke up and thought, what is the good thing about all of this?  What do I see in spite of the pain and the heartache?  Well strangely enough, I see God’s hand.

Some of my coworkers are taking chances and going to do things they’d been wanting to do for years.

My husband has a job!  That is a great thing, so I am definitely thankful for that.

My friends’ husband and child are whole and fully healed in heaven, waiting for them.

Yes, life does suck sometimes, and although I realize that with the good comes the bad, sometimes I just want to sit down and have a big giant pity party.

Thank you for attending!